Health related information and news from around the world.

…the mood is sombre and controlled.

When a large amount of black is mixed into colour, dark colours are created. For example, dark blue, navy, dark green_ deep red, burgundy, dark brown, deep purple, deep russet, black and charcoal. Dark colours suggest control, steadiness and conservativism in intimacy. If your bedroom is dark, you are probably a refined and dignified person who likes to be in control of all experiences in your life, including your sexual experiences. Your bedroom may be luxurious, expensive, or dramatic and stimulating, yet the atmosphere will always be subdued and controlling. If you are financially very successful in business and used to being in control, you could veil choose dark colours for the bedroom. You like to have control in every area of your life.

Combining dark colours with other colours will make quite a statement. If there is no lightening effect you will have created an oppressive atmosphere. Try combining darker colours with pastels, to create a softer and less controlling feeling. Adding pale pink, for instance, to a dark blue, dark green or burgundy coloured bedroom will create a softer, more loving and nurturing environment, both for the inner self and the relationship. Many people combine beige, cream, ivory or white with dark colours as a safe way to soften the look, but all this does is tone down the controlling elements of the dark colours. It does not add the loving elements.

Key words: controlling, steady, serious, subdued, conservative, dignified.

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Is your bedroom a refuge from the hectic outside world, a place where you can escape from the children? Is it a place you love to go to recharge your batteries? If it isn’t, perhaps you need to look at your own needs, and create a space there which is inspiring and relaxing for you to retire to whenever you feel the need. Make it an oasis of peace, pleasure and calm for yourself or with your partner. If you have negative feelings about your bedroom, look closely at your life and examine the intimate and sexual aspects of it. Are there issues in this area that you need to sort out, or past events you need to discard, or repressed emotions you need to deal with? Believe it or not, redecorating the bedroom, a little or a lot, will bring these issues to a head and help to clear the energy. This is healthy.

If you cannot change the bedroom at least change the colour of the towels in your ensuite bathroom leading from the bedroom. If you don’t have an ensuite, then look at your family bathroom. The bathroom is an emotional extension of you, so even a move as small as differently coloured towels can influence your mood.

Making even small colour changes in your bedroom can indicate your changing emotional needs. If you find yourself needing to put white flowers or white sheets into the bedroom you are really seeking new beginnings in your life, or within your current relationship. Pink sheets may indicate that you are in need of some tender loving care. Adding green touches may suggest a need for relaxation and rejuvenation. If an overactive sex life is leaving you exhausted, add some green to the room to create more balance – maybe a plant. If blue is involved in your changes, you may be looking to create a calming respite from a hectic lifestyle.

You have identified the colour choice you have made in your bedroom and its psychological subconscious impact, so what next? You can:

* acknowledge and muse on where you are up to in your sexual life

* change a few items of colour to change your relationships « do nothing and enjoy what you have

* decide to explore your heart and needs and discuss your unhappiness with your partner

* if you live alone, create the bedroom you’d love to have, one which will give you great pleasure and satisfaction

We all move through different colour stages in our lives because of different circumstances, emotions and relationships. None of these is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. They just are.

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There are two types of Dramatic bedrooms:

1. The extreme Dramatic makes a statement with every item in the room. This can be intimidating and only the most Dramatic of people could live with it for any length of time. Relaxation and sleeping don’t come easily in a bedroom like this.

2. The subtle Dramatic, which is a toned down version, has a few items in the room making a statement, but overall it is not as intimidating. You can recognise the subtle type because of the use of red or black somewhere in the colour scheme without them dominating. If not red or black, there is strong contrast in the colour combination.

The female Dramatic bedroom has much creative flair to it. Animal prints, or bold bright combinations of colours such as black, red and gold are used. There is always something eyecatching in the room, whether it be in the design on the doona, an object on display, or the colour combination itself. The female bedroom is often more subtle than the male Dramatics bedroom, though it will still have a very confident air. Something shiny, burnished, highly polished or with a shimmer could well be a feature too. Lacy black underwear or lingerie could be on display, with feather boas adding another Dramatic touch.

The female Dramatic bedroom could be intimidating to a male suitor. He may be wondering if whips or bondage are part of the activities! Keep the door to your bedroom closed until the new man gets to know you. Then your bedroom may well excite him.

The male Dramatic bedroom has strong contrasting colours, such as black, red and white, or animal prints which ‘bring out the animal in them’. The lines are usually angular and geometric. The room will be extreme in colour and design. These men are confident, bold and dominant. They like to be noticed and are often exhibitionists. This will be evident in their sexual style as well.

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The decoration on the wall behind your bed symbolises your life as you sleep. It has a subliminal effect on you. It states who you are, what is important to you and your goals in life. What is the significance of the decoration/painting/print hovering above you?

When you choose a plain wall with no embellishments (disregard the bed head) you are uncomplicated, controlled and serious. Nothing unnecessary for you. On the other hand, a mosquito net, whether small or large, hung above the bed, is very romantic. Placing a large mirror on the wall behind the bed (or on the ceiling) is sensual and erotic and A MOSQUITO NET, certainly an invitation to look at yourself.

Moving completely away from the self-fascinated is the person who places the bed under a window with uninterrupted views to the outside. What an adventure-loving, outgoing, down-to-earth person. A practical person may place the bed under a window with only a view of the wall next door. After all, the bed is for sleeping and sex. Life is reality and if your bedroom doesn’t have a wonderful view, it’s nothing to get upset about.

Perhaps you have a painting of a beautiful nude or something erotic and sexually stimulating on that wall behind your head? Sensuality and sexuality are obviously abiding passions for you awake and asleep. Many people hang a favourite painting on the wall behind the bed. A happy picture of flowers suggests an optimistic outlook. A scene talks to you about dreams and desires. What are your dreams and desires?

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We posed the question and asked many people to answer what does it take to have a loving, long-lasting relationship? We wonder what your reply would be? Here are some of the replies we received:

• ‘Be generous in all things’ MALE, MID FIFTIES.

• The looser the rein, the tighter the hold’ FEMALE, EARLY FORTIES.

• ‘Have patience, love, commitment and long-term common

goals’ MALE, LATE TWENTIES.

• ‘Compromise, common sense, consideration and patience’ FEMALE, MID THIRTIES.

‘Loyalty’ FEMALE, EARLY FIFTIES.

‘Communication and compatability’ MALE, LATE FORTIES.

‘Maintain the gifts which were so important when we were

children: touching and sensuality’ FEMALE, EARLY FORTIES.

‘Common goals, romance and being able to cope with the

changes in the relationship’ MALE, MID THIRTIES.

‘Both having patience, tolerance and being able to listen and

communicate with each other’ FEMALE, MID FIFTIES. ‘Mutual respect for each other and understanding that each party may have other interests,- for example, sporting, career etc. outside the relationship’ MALE, EARLY FIFTIES.

• ‘Consideration for your partner’s feelings and needs. Trust is important too, and by this I mean you need to show you can be trusted and are responsible. Earn the trust before expecting them to trust you. Having open communication, being cooperative and flexible are very important, but above all else, it is important to have fun and laughter’ FEMALE, MID TWENTIES.

• ‘Understanding on both sides’ FEMALE, EARLY FORTIES.

• ‘It takes a great deal of trust and tolerance from both sides. In a relationship you must take the good with the bad. Most important, you should be the best of friends’ FEMALE, EARLY THIRTIES.

• ‘Be sensual’ FEMALE, LATE FORTIES.

• ‘It takes a sense of humour, time made to spend together, doing things you enjoy and lots of talking time’ FEMALE, MID FORTIES.

• ‘Relationships are like riding a bumpy road. You either have to see the potholes and go around them, or experience the shake up along the way. To be successful there must be a constant awareness of the other person. You must talk about your grievances and come to a peaceful understanding’ FEMALE, EARLY SIXTIES.

‘Get the problems out in the open. Be emotionally honest with each other’ MALE, LATE THIRTIES.

‘Be open-minded, flexible and have an element of adventure in the relationship’ FEMALE, LATE FORTIES. ‘If you want to risk having a fling with someone else, weigh up whether what you are gaining is better than what you are losing’ FEMALE, EARLY FORTIES.

‘It’s acting and speaking to each other in a loving way,- having empathy with your mate and being supportive no matter what. And cutting out the sarcasm! It’s important to act as a team and do things together, and probably most of all keep your sense of humour. As an afterthought, a little sex here and there helps too’ MALE, EARLY EIGHTIES.

A thought to inspire you on your journey: ‘man cannot discover new oceans, until he has courage to lose sight of the shore’.

If you have been becalmed too long, reassess your direction and invite your partner in love to enjoy the adventure with you. We salute your courage, your sensuality, your relationships and your life. May your journey be colourful, romantic, sensual and seductive.

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